The last weekend was inundated with quite a number of topical issues that generated all the chatter and without any shred of doubt, the marriage of famed actor, John Dumelo, was the most sensational.
Before taking such a life-altering step, John was one of the most eligible bachelors in the country and his marriage was surely bound to garner fixation and banter – and it comes as no surprise that his union is generating such blabber in the public domain.
Lots of theories, speculations and memes have been generated out of this marriage, which was originally supposed to be organized outside the public spectacle – and the discourse has been diverse and intense, understandably. After all, it is John Dumelo!
In all the commentary that is greeting the marriage, it is also imperative that we do not lose sight of the challenges that would confront the new couple, just like any other marriage.
Celebrities are a very singular sort and although they have that experience of being ‘rich’, famous and inexorably adored, making them seem more godlike than human -they suffer from many of the marital problems as any other ordinary couple.
In reality, celebrities are not gods. They are just as human as the rest of us and because they have an amplified life, they also encounter bigger breakdowns, bigger blowups and bigger pain. They are simply life exaggerated and when they falter, it all happens under the ever-watchful public eye.
John Dumelo have had temptations before marriage and he would endure far more of such after marriage and unfortunately for him, he has little limitations. He is still going to work with some of the most beautiful people across the world and surely, the adoration from his thousands of fans won’t wither.
When things become difficult in the marriage, a situation that is bound to happen at a point, there’s going to be little incentive to stay in there, especially for the popular actor who is accustomed to getting whatever he wants as soon as he wants it.
Power has the potential of changing most people and one of the first things to change is often the size of one’s ego.
In any marriage, it is important to consider your partners’s needs and wants, not just your own but since many celebrities are accustomed to being the center of attention and admiration, this doesn’t work out.
Celebrities who are used to havig everyone cater to them may be resentful when their partners are demanding of their attention too and this may seem like too much work when they can find others who don’t expect as much from them.
When two people who are not willing to bend to anyone else’s will, find that their lives are headed in different directions, that’s a red flag for the union – and this is especially true if a spouse becomes competitive and subsequently, resentful of their partner’s success.
While it is important for John, as the celebrity, to assert his needs in the marriage, his union requires a decision-making based on his needs, the needs of his wife and that of the couple.
By agreeing to marry John Dumelo, Gifty as Mrs. Dumelo is now a celebrity and should brace herself for the intense, unrelenting pressure of public and professional scrutiny. For many, that examination is new to them and too much to handle.
She will be watched, constantly as she and her marriage will always be under review and the press and blogs will dig into her past, her lifestyle and movements just for the headlines – giving room for everyone to go through her business with a fine-toothed comb.
The Dumelos must now have to constantly have ‘the perfect look’ – where they have to act a certain way, tolerate cameras clicking in the faces and adoring fans begging for their time. They will be put on display for the masses and treated as entertainment commodity and gossiped about.
The level of public scrutiny and lack of privacy can be a source of depression, paranoia, and unwanted outside influence and these things wreak havoc on any marriage as one or both partners desperately grasp at coping mechanisms to get through.
Jealousy & Loneliness
Candidly, Mrs. Dumelo is not the only woman that wants her very popular husband – and he can, if he wants to, have his pick of beautiful women. The fact is; John chose Gifty, however, the realities of life and marriage also show that – there may be times when she won’t feel particularly sexy or beautiful and when she becomes a little bit insecure on her off days, that is when the thought of buxom, scantily clad ladies throwing themselves at Mr. Dumelo will drive her crazy.
Unless Mrs. Dumelo quits her job to travel with her husband on all his trips plus visit his movie sets, then she may feel like she’s still alone. This is because, he’s out traveling, making money and enjoying the nightlife in whatever town he’s in while she is sitting home wondering what he’s doing and who he’s doing it with.
Pray For Them & Wish Them Well
Forget the naysayers, John has taken a critical decision in his life, one that depicts his growth as a man and the least we can do is show support.
Marriage is a torrid institution and even more herculean for a celebrity. The union needs the grace of God, so much love, care, understanding and effective communication – and knowing the myriad of challenges that would confront the couple, it is only germane that we wish them well in this pursuit of happiness and pray for them.
Conratulations, Mr. & Mrs. John Dumelo!